Inaugural Dynamics

An inaugural is a unique event. Take this city’s most recent one.

It’s part civic pep rally: celebrating the avatar of the democratic process – even if many voters elected to stay home.

It’s also a most welcome respite, however brief, from the purely political. A time reserved for swearing in, not swearing at. For this freeze-frame moment, public service is not a glib euphemism for politics. And all things are possible again.

And who doesn’t love some gratuitous pomp? A poet laureate, judges, the presentation of the colors, oaths, an invocation, a benediction, the Pledge, the National Anthem, “The Battle Hymn of the Republic.”

We’re also reminded, often movingly, that among Tampa’s natural resources are poet laureate James Tokley, historian Gary Mormino and the First Baptist Church of College Hill Choir.

In her inaugural address, Mayor Pam Iorio picked up where her state of the city speech left off. She outlined her priorities — and notably underscored the need to develop a mass transit system. It’ll be a political hot potato, to be sure, but bully pulpits are overkill on inauguration day. That’s why this one wasn’t prosaically presented. Inaugural presentations always deserve better, and Iorio’s was rhetorically framed by Robert Frost’s “The Road Not Taken.”

Afterward, the new city council convened to pick a new leader and put an abrupt end to the kumbayah interlude. Four rounds of votes later, the new chair was the same as the old chair: that consummate compromise candidate, Gwen Miller.

The political respite was history. Indeed, so much for another opportunity for the city council chair to project a substantial, professional image. A city of Tampa’s stature deserves no less.

And then there was the fiasco about who Miller would appoint to the Hillsborough County Metropolitan Planning Organization, a key transportation policy group.

Notably included: New Tampa’s Joseph Caetano, who’s no fan of rail, and had to have been surprised by his assignment. Notably excluded: Linda Saul-Sena, who has served on the MPO for two decades, and had to have felt blind-sided by her exclusion.

The “road not taken” moves on a lot of levels. And that makes all the difference.

Cuban Cowardice

Slowly but inexorably, the governmental gears are grinding in behalf of a more sensible, less counterproductive policy vis-a-vis Cuba. But Helms-Burton is still in place, the economic embargo is still riddled with Cold War rationales, the travel ban for most Americans is still the law and the South Florida exile community still exercises politician-intimidating, veto power.

Several months back, Rep. Charles Rangel (D-NY) and Rep. Jeff Flake (R-AZ) introduced HR 654, which would end the travel ban to Cuba. To date, it has 95 co-sponsors who feel that America’s aims for change in Cuba could actually be advanced by that island’s populace having more exposure to traveling Americans. To say nothing of the quaint concept that Americans had pretty much gotten used to freely visiting any place that wasn’t unsafe for Americans.

For the record, none of those 95 HR 654 co-sponsors are from Florida.

Well-Traveled Road To Damascus

Of course, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s trip to Syria was blatant, politically partisan grandstanding masquerading as “fact-finding.” But so was that of the Republican trio of congressmen who had preceded her. And then there was last year’s Syrian sortie by Florida Senator Bill Nelson.

This is obviously no way to conduct a coherent, credible foreign policy. The U.S. needs to speak with one consistent, adult, non-partisan voice – without sending the signal that the Bashar Assads are mere props for those who disagree with the Bush Administration.

Ultimately, however, the fault lies with the Administration. It never believed in talking to its adversaries – and thus painted itself into a geo-political corner. It also paved the way for the Iraq Study Group to make the sort of recommendations that gives cover to those who want to free-lance for political gain in the Middle East.

No Reason To Celebrate Run-Off Victories

For last week’s city council run-off, the turnout (15 per cent) was higher than expected. But, then again, we didn’t have any expectations. Anyway, that’s the good news.

The bad news is that the District 7 seat on city council went to a guy, Joseph Caetano, who doesn’t much like being part of the city and was endorsed by — and campaigned with — Charles “White Chocolate” Perkins.

Recall that Caetano introduced “de-annexation” to the political conversation. He will represent the Duchy of New Tampa the way it wants to be represented – reluctantly until secession.

Then there’s the District 1 seat that was retained by the incumbent, 72-year-old Gwen Miller. If ever an election made the case for undervoting, this one did.

For 12 years Miller has been the beneficiary of a political conspiracy of silence: She’s the nice, quiet lady of color that no one wants to be seen as beating up on. She’s less than conversant on the issues and doesn’t speak well when she tries. But she does have people like Jim Davis, Dick Greco and Les Miller speaking up for her.

As it turned out, Miller Lite also benefited by having Joe Redner, 66, as her run-off opponent. That he was more articulate, better on the issues and no longer dressed in a bowling alley ensemble for public forums didn’t matter enough. He had serious baggage and never quite lost that dismissive attitude. His congratulatory phone call to Miller has yet to be placed. Arguably, the anti-Redner sentiment trumped the “what-the-hell,” shake-up-the-establishment vote.

Gadflies, to be sure, can be fun – as well as effective – but this one was a millionaire nudie-club owner who had sued the city countless times. And lest anyone focus unduly on his pertinent views, he went out of his way to remind everybody of his strip-joint rep with that political manna for Miller, the counterproductive “I Voted!” promotion.

Redner’s election would have guaranteed Tampa exposure, so to speak, on Comedy Central. He — and his club, the Mons Venus — were the reason that marquees in places such as Las Vegas would — and did — advertise “Tampa-style” lap-dancing. Even consenting adults didn’t want his kind of business near their neighborhoods.

Had, say, Randy Barron or maybe Julie Jenkins made the run-off instead of Joe Redner, the results might have been different. MIGHT have. That still presupposes an electorate moved more by candidate qualifications than apathy, party fealty or political correctness.

In the end, there were two winners but no reason for anyone else to be celebrating.

“Equality” Lawsuit

Apparently, we haven’t come such a long way after all.

When it comes to race and education, “equality” — that civil rights shibboleth — isn’t enough. In fact, not nearly enough, according to a lawsuit that has Pinellas County educators under the gun in defense of their policy of equal access for all students.

The case, William Crowley vs. the Pinellas County School Board, was brought by a parent who contended that his 7-year-old son, whose academic issues were “typical of those difficulties commonly faced by students of African descent,” was not, like so many other black students, getting an adequate education. The county, in effect, was not customizing education to fit the black experience.

The Crowley case has now morphed into a class action suit that uses the still cavernous racial gap in educational achievement as Exhibit A. Mere “equality,” goes the contention, only reinforces the status quo disparity. This ironic upshot is not what was envisioned for post- Brown vs. Board of Education of Topeka society.

Three points.

*Should this suit succeed, it would be a quantum leap forward for all those who can never get enough social engineering. Where does it end? With “Ebonics: The Sequel”?

With equal results? Not unless the outside variables – from a dysfunctional rap culture and nearly 70 per cent out-of-wedlock birthrates to the “acting white” pejorative sometimes foisted on achieving black students by black contemporaries – are eliminated. Students at their core are individuals – not group adjuncts or mere racial puzzle pieces.

*The numbers game. While white students continue to significantly outpace blacks in academic performance (reading and math) and graduation rates, so do Asian, American Indian and Hispanic students. In fact, Asians top everybody on both lists. These other minorities are not part of the suit, nor are they clamoring for special treatment beyond help for the non-English speaking.

*Education can never be solely about facilities, books and teachers. There are intangibles, such as motivation and aptitude, and life-style variables such as parents, home environment, role models and re-enforcement of what is being taught — from academics to behavior — in school. What you don’t want to be first in is suspensions.

The schools, including those of Pinellas County, can always do better; it’s an ongoing challenge, especially in FCATWorld. But this is no Jim Crow time capsule. Call it classic scapegoating.

It’s much easier to play the race card than to deal with the real issue of properly preparing for success. This is really about what happens – or doesn’t happen – at home and what attitudes are brought to school. What it shouldn’t be about is the premise that one of the largest school systems in the country should be dovetailing its curriculum to accommodate a single minority.

Last year 13,000 black students took the reading FCAT. About 4,300 did well. Better to ask how that happened – than to cite the school district as the pedagogically-challenged reason for those who didn’t.

Tampa’s Tandem

Adamo Drive and Raymond James Stadium don’t typically get mentioned in tandem. Recently, however, they were part of a very high profile, successful Tampa parlay.

Last Monday Ikea, the international furniture retailer, announced that it would be calling the intersection of Adamo and 22nd Street home for its 29th store in the U.S. and third in Florida. The massive, 353,000-square-foot retail location will be its largest in the state.

Ikea’s business model, which assumes a regional shopping base within a radius of 60 miles, bodes well for favorably impacting Ybor City and downtown. It would be the first major retailer anywhere near downtown since Maas Brothers called it an era in 1991.

Now call it a vote of confidence for the Tampa market. It’s more than condos.

The day before, the Ray-Jay hosted a soccer match between the national men’s teams of the U.S. and Ecuador. It was the first time in 12 years that the American national team had played here. The crowd of 31,500 was the largest to watch an international friendly match in this state. Ever.

It meant that the U.S. squad, which outscored Ecuador, 3-1, wasn’t the only winner. Word now is that Tampa has positioned itself for more of these nationally televised, international “friendlies” – plus more credibility as a potential World Cup venue.

Only In America

Last week presidential candidate Barack Obama campaigned in West Palm Beach and drew a big crowd and induced a lot of buzz. The Democratic senator from Illinois called on attendees at the Kravis Center to fight cynicism and embrace a new kind of politics.

But in order to successfully fight that good fight against cynicism and on behalf of a new kind of politics, he will have to raise approximately $100 million by the end of this year. Only in America.

Magrane Tailors His Pitch

He may be the best reason to watch a Tampa Bay Devil Rays’ game – and yet you’ll never see his name in a box score.

He’s TV broadcaster Joe Magrane, 42, the Rays’ conversationally perceptive, engagingly witty, occasionally irreverent color-analyst. He defies the broadcast typecast: former player capitalizing on name recognition and frequently reminding viewers what it was like back in the day.

He’s also good enough to have earned some NBC and Fox network gigs; he did the (Sydney) Olympics in 2000 and (Athens) 2004. He also upstaged the regulars on “The Best Damn Sports Show Period,” and some — well, conspiracy-buff buddies — theorize that’s why he hasn’t been invited back.

“Magrane is pure entertainment,” says Skip Hill, veteran broadcaster and communications instructor at the University of Tampa. “He’s that funny. He can absolutely carry a game.”

And make no mistake, broadcasting a perennial loser such as the Rays – who lost 101 games last season – can require a lot of heavy rhetorical lifting. In Magrane-speak that will range from groan-inducing puns, self-deprecating put-downs and colorful anecdotes to candid — but never personal — criticism of the home team. It could even include a dead-on impersonation of the late, iconic broadcaster Harry Caray when the Rays are out of it early.

“I’m not a journalist,” points out Magrane. “It’s not my job to break stories. I work for the team. My focus is on the how-and-why and to try and brighten up the game.”

That makes him the perfect verbal ping-pong complement to the more staid Dewayne Staats, the Rays’ highly regarded, play-by-play announcer.

“For all of his ‘left-handed’ personality, Joe really is a perfectionist,” points out Staats. “Always prepared as well as fun to be around. And as with any of the really successful guys in this business, people do get a sense of who you are. Really, what you see is what you get.”

For the most part.

Funny and friendly translate well, but a broadcast booth can only frame so much.

You wouldn’t necessarily discern a selfless, highly-sought MC for myriad Bay Area charities, including Abilities Inc. of Florida, the Moffitt Cancer Center and the ChairScholars Foundation.

Nor would you know that this gregarious baseball insider has a traveler’s frame of reference that transcends dugouts and diamonds. Indeed, it ranges from the old world architecture of Prague, a St. Peter’s audience with Pope John Paul II and the “infinite view” of Versailles to the “food-as-art” side of San Francisco.

And from the chest up, of course, nobody looks 6’5″. The boyishly good-looking Magrane is all of that. In fact, 250 pounds worth.

He’s also a walking fashion statement with two custom tailors, New York’s Dominico Spano and Tampa’s Kenneth E. Jennings, having his pattern on file and his cell number on speed dial. He was once featured in GQ magazine as “The Most Eligible Bachelor in Baseball.”

“Joe looks magnificent,” says Jennings. “He’s an Apollo.”

An Apollo who can also be sartorially eclectic. Seemingly nothing doesn’t go well with arch-supporting, custom-made cowboy boots, courtesy of favorite Fort Worth cobblers. Magrane also has some black-and-white wingtips that resemble classic spats and retro sports coats that only a certified fashionista could get away with.

“Oh, he can be very demanding,” acknowledges Jennings. “I’ve said ‘good bye’ to a suit because he wasn’t happy with it. And that’s as it should be. I’m meticulous myself, and I’m expensive.” Indeed, an average Kenneth Jennings Saville Row Bespoke Tailors’ suit sells for $2,500, with some topping out at $10,000.

Magrane favors blues and grays as well as dark stripes and peak lapels. It’s all about “context” and looking “dignified,” he explains.

“It’s important to look classy,” Magrane underscores. “Just like it’s important to be well-mannered. I guess I’m ‘old-school’ on this one.

“As a player, I always thought it was an honor and a privilege to wear a big league uniform,” points out Magrane. “It was important to make a good impression when fans saw you, and you weren’t in a Woodstock tee-shirt and flip flops.”

Among the few places you’ll find the dressed-down Magrane these days: Old Memorial Golf Course, Dubliner’s Irish Pub in South Tampa and within the 6,500 well-appointed square feet of his North Tampa Avila home – nestled next to the Avila links’ 11th hole. He resides there with his wife of 15 years, Renee, and daughters Sophia, 9, and Shannon, 11, students at the Academy of Holy Names in Tampa. All manner of framed family visages — not sports or celebrity memorabilia — dominate the décor.

As does the Magrane sense of humor, according to Renee.

“He tells me I have whoopee-cushion humor, and he’s dry,” she says. “But, yes, he’s always funny around the house.”

And according to Renee, always making the best of found family time in the travel-challenged life that is the cross-country lot of a Major League Baseball broadcaster. That varies from shuttling his daughters to school in the off-season to engaging in animated games of catch in the back yard.

“He has a roughhouse side and he’s a ‘man’s man’ sort,” notes Renee, “but his little girls absolutely steal his heart. He’s a good family person, and he believes in putting time and energy into his kids – and making sure they know right from wrong.”

Between baseball seasons the Magranes make it a point to set aside a weekly “date night.” It’s either a movie or dinner out with close friends. The Capital Grille in International Plaza is a favorite venue as are nearby Roy’s and Flemming’s. On occasion, they’ll escape to a mini get-away at the Don Cesar resort on St. Pete Beach.

However many times he crosses the Howard Frankland Bridge, Magrane says he never takes the commute for granted.

“I never fail to notice what a neat area this is,” says Magrane. “When the sun hits the water, it’s like a post card. And we have it year round. How lucky is that?”

Magrane: The Player

Des Moines, Iowa native Joe Magrane was an All-American pitcher at the University of Arizona and a first-round draft choice of the St. Louis Cardinals in 1985. He signed for a bonus of $110,000.

In 1987 he finished third in balloting for the National League’s “Rookie of the Year” honors. The next year he led the league in ERA (Earned Run Average) at 2.18. In 1989 he won 18 games for the Cardinals and finished fourth in the NL’s MVP voting.

Little did he know, however, that he had peaked in his third season. A series of arm ailments and three elbow surgeries prematurely ended his career in 1996 at 32.

He joined Tampa Bay – along with broadcast partner Dewayne Staats – and began his 10-year association with the Rays in their inaugural season of 1998. Magrane and Staats are signed through 2008.

Banter Up

* “Steroids in baseball: That’s like putting a mustache on the Mona Lisa.”

* “No, I don’t begrudge today’s players making what they do. Hey, you can’t take it with you. That’s why there are no luggage racks on hearses.”

* “I was having dinner the other night with Bono, and he said, ‘Joe, nobody likes a name-dropper.'”

* “There’s a parallel between being a pitcher and a broadcaster. Once the words leave your mouth, there’s no getting them back – just like a bad pitch. I know.”

* “I live on a golf course. Far enough away to not be in the line of fire, close enough to hear the expletives over a missed putt.”

* “Last year Dewayne (Staats) and I reached the exalted status of having our own bobble head give-away. We became caricatures of ourselves. Maybe we are anyhow.”

Saddlebrook’s Winning Combination

When Saddlebrook Resort opened a quarter century ago, there was no mistaking what it was. It was a resort designed for meetings. Exclusively. Nearly 500 rustic, Wesley Chapel acres – about 30 miles north of Tampa International Airport – devoted to the care and comfort of corporate America away from home. Plenty of places to meet, eat, sleep, schmooze and play.

Fast forward 25 years. More than 80 per cent of its business is still conferences – on average between 450 and 475 a year, ranging in group size from 10 to nearly 900. From Heineken and Harlequin to ITT, Nestle-Purina and PricewaterhouseCoopers.

But the differences are as notable as they are noticeable: the Arnold Palmer Golf Academy; the Harry Hopman Tennis Academy; a 270-foot-long, 500,000-gallon SuperPool; 45 tennis courts; a luxury spa; a five-acre, wooded team-building venue; a prominent sports village and fitness center; and more than 250 private homes, such as the one that Jennifer Caprioti is building on bucolic Fox Hunt Drive. And the (pooled condo) accommodations now number 800 guest rooms and one-, two- and three-bedroom suites. Wireless, high-speed internet access is ubiquitous. The ranks of employees have swelled to 850. There’s even a fully-accredited (K-3) school, Saddlebrook Preparatory.

“We’re a resort first,” emphasizes Alberto Martinez-Fonts, Saddlebrook’s director of marketing, advertising and public relations. “We are a local business driven by large corporations.”

But while meeting planners have Saddlebrook on speed dial, it’s golf and tennis that have given the resort its international renown. From early on, Saddlebrook has been much more than well-regarded camps and clinics. It’s been a legend magnet.

There are the iconic names of (the late Australian Davis Cup captain) Hopman and Palmer, and the latter’s two signature courses plus a host of tennis luminaries who have learned and lived here. To name-drop a few, in addition to Caprioti: Pete Sampras, Jim Courier, James Blake, Martina Hingis and Justine Henin-Hardenne. There are also the surfaces, which replicate those of all four Grand Slams: Har-Tru, Deco-Turf, grass and clay. Saddlebrook is also the official resort of the Women’s Tennis Association (WTA).

You never know who you’ll find hitting – or living – here. And you never know who you’ll find that may be tomorrow’s Tiger Woods or Roger Federer.

There’s even a chance that they are among the 132 students enrolled at Saddlebrook Prep. About 45 per cent are from overseas – from Venezuela to Vietnam. Approximately 60 per cent of the students (grades 7-12) combine academics with an intense focus on tennis instruction, the remainder on golf. Classroom ratios are about 10:1. Room, board, tuition and instruction runs $37,500 per year.

Headmaster Larry Robison pointedly notes his school’s priorities.

“Our mission is to prepare them for college,” states Robison, a former principal at Zephyrhills High School. “And we support the sports endeavors. In that order.”Indeed, he has the numbers to underscore his point. Nearly 95 per cent of Saddlebrook grads earn college scholarships.Cole Conrad, 17, an 11th grader from Fairfield, Conn., expects no less.

“Connecticut in the winter isn’t exactly ideal for tennis,” he says. “Here I get to play all the time, and I like the mix of coaches. I’m probably three times better than when I arrived (the previous year). I’m hoping for a scholarship; preferably here in Florida.”

The National Amateur Hour

A recent “Newsweek” poll indicated that a majority of the public – 58 per cent – believes the firing of those eight U.S. attorneys was politically motivated.

Question: Given that all such U.S. attorneys serve at the “pleasure” of the president, why wasn’t the poll response 100 per cent?

Isn’t this debacle a subset of the sausage metaphor? Some things – such as the passing of laws, the editing of news, the making of sausage – you just don’t want to see? The process is never pretty, especially the one at the Justice Department that’s always rife with political agendas and chronic cronyism.

This is another installment of the White House Amateur Hour. An Administration utterly unsuited to deal with oversight in the new Democratic, subpoena-empowered Congress. Not even resident sage Fred Fielding could deter them from the clichéd, passive-voiced, pseudo mea culpa: “mistakes were made.”

And, realistically, if the White House is forced to dump its clueless, Texas-loyalist Attorney General, Alberto Gonzales, who does the president send over to satisfy Sen. Patrick Leahy’s Judiciary Committee? Is Ramsey Clark available?