Sports Shorts

  • Whether the Tampa Bay Lightning make the playoffs or not this year, this much is certain: Either General Manager Brian Lawton or head coach Rick Tocchet will be gone. That was assured after Lawton fired Tocchet’s assistant – and close friend – Wes Walz without consulting – merely informing – Tocchet. Lawton then brought in his friend, successful, minor league (Norfolk) coach Jim Johnson. Disagreements happen — and can be worked through. An undermining, public act of disrespect can’t. New owner Jeff Vinik didn’t need this subplot.
  • Word is that New York is now the favorite for the 2014 Super Bowl. It’s part of the NFL’s strategic habit of rewarding markets with new stadiums. But a football game — let alone this one — in an open-air stadium in East Rutherford, N.J. in February?
  • And smooth move by that Tampa Bay Bucs’ staffer who, during a Senior Bowl player interview, asked former Florida State safety Myron Rolle if he felt he had “deserted” his teammates by leaving school after his junior year. Rolle, a pre-med major with designs on being a neurosurgeon, spent his senior year as a Rhodes scholar at Oxford. Would that the Seminoles — and the NFL — had more such Rolle models.
  • Oh, Canada: Congratulations to the Canadian hockey team on its thrilling, sudden-death, Olympic gold-medal win over the U.S. on Sunday. Too bad Marty St. Louis or Steve Stamkos couldn’t have been part of it to ease the nationalistic disappointment back home. But that just tells you how many talented players were available to Canada.

But here’s another thought. Why not make Olympic hockey a double elimination tournament, as is done with NCAA baseball? That way, when the two bracket winners meet in the final – and one is undefeated and the other has a loss (to its gold medal opponent) — the one-loss team has to win two in a row to earn gold.

  • Almost overshadowed by hockey on the Olympics’ last weekend was the impressive performance of Steve Holcomb, who piloted the four-man U.S. bobsled to a gold-medal. The U.S. hadn’t won the event since 1948. Moreover, the portly Holcomb, who had given up chasing his dream because of a degenerative eye condition, had made a remarkable comeback after successful surgery.

      Only one downside, and I’ll be delicate. Bobsledders wear really, uh, snug, skin-

      tight uniforms. It helps to be ripped. It hurts to be flabby. If there’s a next time,

      Steve, work in a salad. If not, work in a girdle and a cup.

Quoteworthy

  • “Your most precious asset is time. Spend your money foolishly, spend your time wisely.” – Baseball Hall of Fame pitcher Sandy Koufax.
  • “You’re right, there was an imbalance on the opening statements, because I’m the president.” President Barack Obama in response to GOP Sen. Mitch McConnell’s complaint that Democrats had more speaking time than Republicans at the recent health care reform summit.
  • “The last year has shown that aid to states and cities may be the single most effective form of stimulus. Unlike road- or bridge-building, it can happen in weeks. And unlike tax cuts, state and local aid never languishes in a household’s savings account.” – David Leonhardt, New York Times.
  • “They have to fall somewhere.” – Col. Bruce McClintock, commander of the 96th Air Base Wing at Eglin AFB, on what inevitably happens to drones and spent missiles — in the context of problematic off-shore drilling scenarios.

Winter Olympics: Why We Watch

 

It’s now a quadrennial happening: not just the Winter Olympic Games — but their increasing spectator-sport appeal.

 

Through the first week of the Vancouver Games, NBC reports that more than 160 million Americans – or more than half the country – have watched the Olympics. And I know I’m not the only viewer seduced by a confluence of unlikely sports – from ones I can barely identify, let alone explain — such as biathlon and curling — to the marquee staples of alpine skiing and figure skating. And none of those sleds are named “Rosebud.”

 

The reasons are multiple – and manifest.

 

The novelty. Our mass-culture, spectator sports are football, baseball and basketball. With allowances for golf, tennis and soccer. And apologies to NASCAR. Soaring ski-jumpers and acrobatic snowboarders and aerialists are either foreign or fringe. We don’t identify with such participants; we simply watch in wonder.  For once, the word “awesome” actually fits.

 

And because the Games come during basketball season, it provides, frankly, a welcome respite – as well as a societal juxtaposition. From Lindsey Vonn and Shaun White to Apolo Ohno and Shani Davis to Kevin Lysacek and Bode Miller, the athletes are uniformly engaging and well spoken. And seemingly tattoo-challenged behind those cover-all uniforms. And how refreshing to see winners who know the difference between triumphant celebration and look-at-me boorishness.  

 

The nationalism. I still experience a visceral jolt when I hear Al Michaels’ rhetorically ask if we “still believe in miracles?” That’s sports shorthand for the ultimate, unfathomable upset: that of the Soviet Union’s Big Red Hockey Machine by a bunch of amateur Americans in 1980 at Lake Placid. “The Miracle on Ice” is enough to evoke nostalgia for the simpler, geopolitical dynamics of the Cold War.

 

And while we all want to — and do — appreciate the best in the world, we can’t help rooting for fellow Americans. It makes the viewing that much more compelling. All those Canadians — who mortgage all their emotions on hockey and who shouted “Bleep USA” after the Americans upset Canada last Sunday — would obviously understand.

 

And by the way, shouldn’t figure skater Evan Lysacek be awarded a second medal, this one for grace under fire – by a fusillade of Russian sour grapes? Major plaudits for how he handled the classless controversy surrounding his gold medal margin over Russian legend-in-the-making Yvgeni Plushenko.

 

The Ultimate. With the possible exception of hockey (see Cup, Stanley), Winter Olympic events represent the various sports’ ultimate forum. There’s nothing more prized than Olympic gold. The same can’t be said for the Summer Games – where the basketball, soccer, baseball, tennis — and now golf — competitions, for example, are not their sports’ pinnacle events.

 

The motivation. The aforementioned curling is a prime example. As a hybrid of shuffleboard and billiards, it hardly excites. I mean, could darts, foosball and liar’s poker be looming? But I still find myself looking in on it. That’s because it’s as much about metaphor as medals.

 

Although the sport is growing, nobody’s getting rich over curling. And, yet, it embodies an Olympic ideal that more glamorous events can’t. It’s not about fame and fortune. It couldn’t be. There are no marketing bonanzas and sponsorship coups awaiting. There’s some local celebrity status, but not enough to obviate the need for a real job.

 

Curling is what participants do on their own. They do it because they love it, and because it’s doable that they can be among the very best in the world at something – if they are dedicated enough. They obviously are.

 

The back stories. The up-close-and-personal accounts are interesting and often moving. From the Chicago inner city black kid who grew up to be speed skating gold medalist Shani Davis to Bode Miller, the outrageously talented, bodacious skier who redeemed himself and grew into an Olympic champion.  

 

The Vancouver Games are now in the homestretch. It will be another four years before they resume in Sochi, Russia.

 

But, hey, next month is “March Madness.” Seems more aptly named than ever.

 

 

Dissenting On Cuba

When it comes to Cuba, the deja view from Washington remains frustratingly familiar.

 

Last week’s talks on immigration between notably high-level American and Cuban officials in Havana showed promise. Such talks had been suspended for six years. The promise imploded into polemics and recriminations, however, after U.S. officials met with Cuban dissidents.

 

Explained a senior State Department official: “Worldwide we have a policy of reaching out. We’re not inclined to make exceptions to that.”

 

How principled. One dissident size fits all.

 

Indeed, why not treat Cuba precisely the same as every other off-shore sovereign with whom we’ve imposed a counterproductive Cold War embargo for 48 years? Obviously the Bush-Cheney playbook never noted that “helping” such dissidents helps neither the cause of normalized Cuban-American relations — and the economic, geo-political and humanitarian benefits inherently resulting — nor the dissidents.

 

And speaking of the embargo, here’s the take of Cuba’s internationally renown (“Generation Y”) blogger Yoani Sanchez, named by Time magazine as one of its “100 Most Influential People in the World” in 2008:

 

            “Far from suffocating the ruling class of the island, these trade restrictions create material difficulties for the population and feed the radicalization of the ideological discourse inside Cuba. The embargo has been an argument to justify the unproductive and inefficient state-run economy, including the total ruin of various sectors. Worse than that, it has been used to support the maxim: ‘In a country under siege, dissent is treason,’ which contributes to the lack of freedoms for my fellow citizens.”

Quoteworthy

  • “And I stated since the very first day I came in to anybody who would ask, and I was asked quite often, we’re not going to be there through 2027. It just can’t happen. Baseball won’t allow it. Our partners in baseball won’t allow it. The other teams won’t allow it. And it’s just not the right thing for our organization, and quite frankly it’s not the right thing for our population.” – Tampa Bay Rays’ owner Stuart Sternberg on why the Trop lease is hardly sacrosanct.
  • “Never has the political class and the mainstream media that covers them been more out of touch with the American people than they are today.” – Marco Rubio in last week’s address to the Conservative Political Action Conference in Washington.
  • “If the Olympic champion doesn’t know how to jump the quad, I don’t know. Now it’s not men’s figure skating. It’s dancing.” – Russian silver medalist Evgeni Plushenko.

Kevin White: The Amazing Disgrace Candidate

It was not one of democracy’s finest hours. Not the sort of democratic dynamic we like to lecture other countries about, that’s for sure.

 

More than 200 supporters turned out at the Columbia Restaurant recently for a fundraiser for incumbent Hillsborough County Commissioner Kevin White. THAT Kevin White. Of tapping-into-campaign-funds-to-buy-stylish-threads fame. Of being-on-the-losing-end-of-a-sleazy-sexual-harassment-suit renown. Of forcing-taxpayers-to-ante-up-for-resultant- court-judgments repute. Of turning-arrogance-into-an-understatement distinction.

 

Notably, the Tampa Tribune, St. Petersburg Times and several TV stations covered it. Normally, that’s an impressive sign of name-recognition acknowledgement and success. Media coverage and free press are the coin of the political realm.

 

But, then, they also cover high-profile fires, deadly auto accidents and the latest after-hours crime scene at Club Mirage.

 

They covered the White fundraiser because, even in these times of consummate cynicism over the political process and curtailed budgets, supporters of White pique media interest. As in: “And you still want this guy to be re-elected?” As in: “And you’re willing to fork over your own money to advance this scruples-challenged career?”

 

One explanation may be the rationale that USF political science professor Susan MacManus pointed out the other day to the Tampa Tribune. “Historically, minority communities rally around minority candidates when it looks like those candidates are under attack,” she explained.

 

If that principle’s in play here, then the politics of race just absorbed another black eye.

Rays Are Regional Asset

At some point, key St. Petersburg officials will surely see that when it comes to finding a permanent home for the Tampa Bay Rays, Hillsborough County interests aren’t so much meddling – as they are engaging on an issue of overwhelming regional importance. Surely.

 

St. Petersburg Mayor Bill Foster and the City Council should, along with the Rays and the ABC Coalition, be part of the creative, pragmatic brain-storming aimed at keeping the home team in the Tampa Bay market. Instead the irrational, head-in-the-sand St. Pete officials have behaved as if that 2027 Trop lease is sacrosanct and Hillsborough County Commission Chairman Ken Hagan is a saboteur because he invited the ABC Coalition to make a regional stadium-site presentation. And ABC, it should be noted, consists largely of Pinellas-county based executives – and was formed by former St. Petersburg Mayor Rick Baker.

 

This need not — indeed, must not — be a zero-sum game: downtown St. Petersburg – take it or leave it. An out-of-state market would take it. The “San Antonio Rays” would be the most likely legacy of such an exercise in provincial ego, obstinacy and stupidity.

 

That the regional Rays are ill-served by a (downtown St. Petersburg) facility on the western fringe of a demographically skewed marketplace is manifestly evident. That the Rays will not remain where they are through 2027 is a foregone reality to everyone but St. Pete operatives who still won’t even meet with ABC.

 

Two recent quotes are illustrative of the Rays’ situation.  

 

  • “And I stated since the very first day I came in to anybody who would ask, and I was asked quite often, we’re not going to be there (Trop) through 2027. It just can’t happen. Baseball won’t allow it. Our partners in baseball won’t allow it. The other teams won’t allow it. And it’s just not the right thing for our organization, and quite frankly it’s not the right thing for our population.” – Rays’ owner Stuart Sternberg.
  • “It boggles my mind that there is room for debate. They need a new stadium.” – Major League Baseball Commissioner Bud Selig.

 

Obviously there will be no Trop-based Rays in 2027. Obviously there will be no Trop-based Rays well in advance of that. And common sense, let alone the findings of the ABC Coalition, are graphic reminders that downtown St. Pete, Trop scenarios notwithstanding, is not an acceptable stadium site in this challenging, hybrid market.

 

What also is unacceptable is an ongoing, cavalier approach by St. Petersburg officials that pits their perverse, parochial pride against the vested interest of the entire region. Everyone benefits if the Rays remain; the most conservative estimate of the franchise’s economic impact on the area is in excess of $160 million annually. Nobody wins if all that remains from a relocated franchise is the blame game.

 

Sure, the financial scenarios inherent in any viable plan to keep the Rays in Tampa Bay are more than problematic. Whether the sites are Channelside, the Florida Fairgrounds or St. Pete’s more politically palatable Gateway area. But all the more reason that narrow, counterproductive thinking cannot be countenanced. 

Criminal Stupidity

There’s tragedy — planes crash and local soldiers die — and then there’s this: A pineapple grenade blows up in the face of a 9-year-old, Lakeland boy. The boy’s mother had bought it at an auction. The boy’s father helped him fill it with black firecracker powder.

 

The boy pulled it off a shelf and ignited it with a lighter.

 

A grenade? Even a python makes more sense.

Palin: The ShamWow Candidate

I hadn’t intended to write about Sarah Palin this week. Honest.

 

For one thing, I touched on the poster lass for populist prostitution last week. For another, I preferred not to re-conjure the implications of Palin’s ongoing, political reconnaissance – from book tour idol to Tea Party icon to NASCAR avatar — so soon, because it’s, well, depressing. Every kid’s favorite elementary-school teacher as credible candidate for the world’s most demanding, most important job. Dan Quayle never looked so substantial.

 

Indeed, thanks yet again, John “Country First” McCain. When we needed a true patriot, we got a real political knave.

 

But then I read David Broder’s column over the weekend. It was a veritable Palin paean. And Broder’s hardly one of those “shill, baby, shill,” cheerleading Fox pundits. He’s a Pulitzer-prize winning journalist, author and University of Maryland professor. He’s the centrist “dean of the Washington Press Corps.” By all accounts, he should know better.

 

“Those who want to stop her will need more ammunition than deriding her habit of writing on her hand,” observed Broder after Palin’s Tea Party presentation in Nashville of safe bromides, pious piffle and diluted dogma. “The lady is good.”

 

But “good” at what? Good at what a former TV sports reporter should be good at? Al Keck was pretty good too.

 

I saw George Wallace at a rally in a packed, wall-to-wall-y’all hangar at the St. Petersburg-Clearwater Airport in 1972, and he was good. Work-the-house good. Funny good. Ridicule-all-things-Washington and ‘pointy-headed-liberals’ good. But not “good” enough to vote for unless you signed on to “states’ rights” as blatant code for racial superiority and segregation.

 

Palin is not in the populist tradition of William Jennings Bryan or Ross Perot. Or George Wallace. She’s not that smart. And it’s well documented. Thank you, Charlie Gibson and Katie Couric. But she is — for the disaffected and self-disenfranchised — a template for trying times.

 

She is the ShamWow candidate.

 

She absorbs the personal frustrations, veiled racism, dogmatic simplicity, rabid jingoism and fundamentalist fears that smolder in a chunk of the electorate. Then she reflects it back: Government is the problem, the scapegoat and the arch enemy of common sense. Then cue the invocation of Ronald Reagan and pretend that he did more than inveigh against government’s size and impact.  She proceeds to obliterate the distinction between the governing and the governed. She’s the “soccer mom” bull horn of the latter, awaiting their Howard Beal, “mad as hell…not going to take it any more,” lash-out epiphany.

 

Palin underscored her appeal the day after Nashville in a Fox interview with Chris Wallace. “I’m not going to pretend like I know more than the next person,” she pointedly noted. “I’m not going to pretend to be an elitist. In fact, I’m going to fight the elitist, because for too often and for too long now, I think the elitists have tried to make people like me and people in the heartland of America feel like we just don’t get it, and big government’s just going to have to take care of us.”

 

Would that Broder hadn’t given her a political pass on that one.

 

Populism isn’t a synonym for knowledge deficit. Being ill-read, poorly traveled and frame-of-reference challenged shouldn’t be a form of egalitarian seduction. After all, shouldn’t we want our ultimate leader to flat-out know more than the “next person?”  And not, in an “extemporaneous” aside, be limited by how much can be written on the palm of a hand?

 

And shouldn’t Broder have called out Palin for applying one of the lamest rhetorical hustles known to politiciankind. The specious, “us-against-them” comparison where you get to define “them” to your utter advantage. Hence, those who know more are really posturing, dictating “elitists.” Syllogistically speaking, who really needs a real-world-challenged, Harvard Law Review editor and Bolshevik theorist who is channeling Norman Thomas? Not when you can have a marginal communications student and half-term governor who can field dress a moose and raise a daughter too good for Levi Johnston.   

 

But I did agree with Broder’s assessment that Palin was “perhaps the most visible Republican in the land.” My only quibble would be with “perhaps.” A vice presidential candidacy, Fox TV gig, reality-show celebrity status, calculated ubiquity, a GOP contender chasm and a base of vigilante-patriots ensure as much. Certainly neither Newt Gingrich nor Mitt Romney can top this act. In fact, they may be closet “elites.”

 

And for what it’s worth, yes, I did catch Palin’s populist-diva act down at the Convention Center in the early fall of 2008, along with lightweight acolyte Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Frankly, Wallace’s populist panderfest was better. Good thing there was no cable punditocracy and partisan politics as prime-time entertainment back then. 

 

But, no, the lady is not good. But she is great copy, even if her unscripted syntax would embarrass a rookie Rotarian.

 

But her ShamWow candidacy? That’s real. And that is really scary.

Re-Think Luge

Amid the recriminations and post-mortems in the aftermath of that tragic luge accident at the Vancouver Olympics, one question was notably not asked. Is this event necessary?

 

Forget for now the relative inexperience and strategic mistakes made by the 21-year-old victim from the Republic of Georgia. Or that red flags were unfurled all week long in practice runs about the $105-million course designed to push speed to ever-outer limits.

Put it this way: Do the Olympics really need an event that turns an athlete — in a feet-first supine position — into a human projectile?

 

Not that luge is a glamorous, cornerstone event. Up until 1964, the winter games managed without it. Perhaps they could manage to do so again.