Fickle Fingers Of Fate Bedevil Bucs And Bolts

Whether the Bucs make the playoffs this year, much less advance any further, is sobering testimony to factors beyond the control of Jon Gruden, Monte Kiffin, Rich McKay and any and all Glazers.

The NFL, with its premium on parity, might as well stand for “Not For Long” — as in the reign of defending Super Bowl champions. The salary cap, free agency, tougher schedules for high achievers and reverse-order-of-finish college draft conspire against a Super Bowl redux, let alone a dynasty.

Then add the vagaries of refereeing (Oops, that on-side kick recovery really wasn’t legal and shouldn’t have been allowed) and the misfortune of crippling injuries, and it’s easy to see how a Super Bowl year can be followed by a sub-par season.

Much more frustrating, however, are the scenarios that could unfold for the Lightning. Under the stern and savvy leadership of coach John Tortorella, the Lightning are no longer a parody of an NHL team. They are good and getting better. Expectations legitimately include a Stanley Cup run.

The timing, however, couldn’t be worse — or more ironic.

The collective bargaining agreement between the league and the players’ association expires Sept. 15, 2004. To date, discussions have gone nowhere.

The critical issue is salary cap — not unlike what the NFL imposes. No other major pro league spends a higher percentage (76 percent) of revenues on player salaries and benefits. And no other league needs one more.

The NHL is not only not flush like the NFL, but it’s in serious financial straits. Last year the league’s 30 teams totaled operating losses of some $300 million. Two franchises, Ottawa and Buffalo, filed for bankruptcy. Its network television money is a veritable pittance. Teams are overly dependent on ticket sales — just to limit losses. It’s no way to run — or stay — in business.

While the players’ association remains adamant in its opposition to a salary cap, the owners are doing nothing to dispel the notion that a lockout awaits. Should that occur, and talk is of a stoppage that could last more than a season, it could be disastrous for the NHL. It doesn’t have the staying power to survive — at least intact — such a shutdown showdown. Smaller-market franchises in areas without an established hockey culture — such as the Lightning — are especially vulnerable. Last year the Lightning had its most successful season ever — yet still lost a reported $10 million.

The Bucs post-championship challenge was a formidable one: to defy the odds and repeat. Should the Lightning’s Cup runneth over, the Bolt’s challenge could be even more daunting: to defy economic reality and stay in business.

MohaMADDENING Update

Recently the Pentagon’s Lt. Gen. William G. Boykin spoke out of turn and referenced the war on terrorism in religious terms. As in Us vs. Them. As in Christianity vs. Islam. Bad move.

It might be “jihad” to the other side, but we keep it secular. In fact, we pledge to do so. Defending America is a life-and-death challenge, but offending others is unconscionable.

A predictable firestorm of outrage resulted from Boykin’s bumbling. Calls for his ouster immediately ensued. Sure, a Saudi diplomat went apoplectic, but the domestic backlash included Democratic presidential candidates. When we’re on top of our self-criticism game, nobody bashes us like us.

Administration embarrassment was palpable, and there were the requisite apologies.

Now consider something that Malaysian Prime Minister Mahatir Mohamad said the other day. He stated that “Jews rule the world by proxy” and recruit others “to fight and die for them.” In a historical take of alarmingly devious proportions, he declared that the Jews “invented socialism, communism, human rights and democracy so that persecuting them would appear to be wrong

USF: CPA Stud

Amid all the budget scenarios and Big East subplots, it was easy to miss a recent USF achievement. Once again, USF is a national leader in helping its graduates prepare for the CPA licensing exam.

Specifically, USF had the second highest passing rate in the country on the most recent Uniform CPA Examination. With a passing rate of 66.7 percent, USF finished second to the University of Arizona at 69.2 percent. USF finished eighth in the nation last year.

So there. USF doesn’t have to be in a BCS conference to vie for national honors.

Blue, Peach Greenback’s Makeover Incomplete

Arguably, the multi-hued makeover of the $20-dollar bill works. The floating shades of soft blue, green and peach are easy on the eyes, and the image of an eagle next to President Andrew Jackson is a nice touch. And twenties, with their new watermarks and security threads, are now a lot harder to counterfeit, which is why the pricey project was undertaken in the first place.

But here’s the part that makes less sense. Why stop with color tones and new design elements? Wouldn’t this have been the perfect time to do something with that dyspeptic portrait of Jackson? How about a kinder, gentler Jackson? Alas, he looks like he’s down to his last 20-spot.

Cheering For Title IX

According to the NCAA, cheerleading is not an intercollegiate sport, at least not the kind that warrants scholarships. The University of Maryland, however, is currently testing that tenet. To expedite compliance with the equal opportunity mandates of Title IX — and to save some men’s scholarships — UM has promoted part of its cheerleading squad to varsity status this year.

It might be that UM has happened upon a new model to satisfy the Byzantine requirements of the gender-equity gendarmes. Or it might be that the NCAA will see it as an impermissible ruse to skirt the original intent of Title IX.

Would that cheerleaders could be acknowledged for what they are. Being gymnastically athletic is a bonus. Being a babe is a must. It’s not cheerleading; it’s cheer providing.

Fireable Offenses: Race, Yes; Treason, No

Rush Limbaugh gets, in effect, fired by ESPN for going off the reservation with some ill-timed racial comments. Robert Novak, however, still plays the cartoon conservative on CNN’s “Crossfire” and “The Capital Gang” despite his despicable outing of a CIA operative.

Obviously some indiscretions are judged more harshly than others. Limbaugh was easily labeled a racist and had to go. Novak, however, was only guilty of selfishly putting an agent at risk and compromising the credibility and safety of all her contacts.

Cuban Politics: Panderfest Plays On

Maybe you saw it; maybe not. It was easy to miss.

It was another one of those official, rhetorically flourished, knee-jerk responses from Havana blaming Washington for something. More criticism of a democracy by a dictatorship. As such, it was given its proper media burial — less than three inches on page 8 of the Tampa Tribune’s Nation/World section last week. Right under another brief: “Kennedy Memorabilia Collector Dies.”

The item noted that the Cuban government was accusing the Bush administration of pandering to Cuban-American voters with some new, loophole-closing initiatives aimed at Havana.

President Bush had earlier ordered the Homeland Security Department to crack down on illegal U.S. tourism, limit heretofore-legal “people-to-people” visits and raise the number of Cubans eligible for legal admission to the United States. He had done so in a prominent Rose Garden address in front of an embargo-friendly audience, basking in the ostensible imprimatur of Secretary of State Colin Powell and the enthusiastic concurrence of Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Mel Martinez, a Cuban native. Powell and Martinez will be co-leading a commission to prepare for — and hasten the onset of — a sovereignty-challenged, post-Castro Cuba.

Havana, of course, blasted the administration for using Cuba as a forum to help secure a Florida election victory next year.

But here’s what hurts. It’s true. And it would have been no less true if Al Fox, Al Sharpton or Al Franken had said it. Forget the messenger on this one.

Just recall that in the last, mother-of-all-contested presidential elections, Bush won approximately 80 per cent of the 450,000 votes cast by Cuban-Americans in South Florida. In what could be another razor-thin, statewide margin, he wants to keep those anti-Castro votes in a Republican lock box.

When it comes to Cuba, American administrations have been gutless — but not guileless. The Bush administration is an extension of that pro-embargo, exile-community-panderfest of a policy, an especially absurd extension given that we are that much farther removed from any Red Menace threat of Fidel Castro and his Marxist acolytes.

In a post-9/11 world, Muslim fanatics and policies of pre-emption and unilateralism are our priority issues and gravest concerns. Dysfunctional relics of the Cold War aren’t relevant, save for narrowly focused, one-issue constituency, domestic political ends.

Treating Cuba as if it were still a Soviet outpost of geopolitical pertinence is beyond bewildering. Treating it as if it were all a matter of principle is hypocritical in the context of America’s relationships with former enemies and Mideast autocracies. It’s also mean-spirited and inhumane to all the innocent people adversely affected. Moreover, it’s counterproductive and stupid; engagement is more effective than isolation. What’s more, it’s venal.

In fact, heavy on the venality when it comes to presidential politics; Florida has 27 electoral votes and 1 million Cuban-Americans. Arguably, President Bush can’t be re-elected without Florida.

When Bush recently declared that he is tightening the screws on Castro, it played predictably well in South Florida and among the usual hardliners here in Tampa, who even objected to the Ballet Nacional de Cuba coming to town.

Bush wants the embargo maintained, American visitations reduced, Cuban immigrant visas increased and U.S.-government supported Radio and TV Marti expanded. Fewer American travelers, reasons Bush, would mean fewer dollars for Cuba’s $2-billion tourist industry. It is estimated that some 200,000 Americans annually visit Cuba, as many as a third illegally.

But the president phrased it in vintage Bushspeak. Fewer American visitors, he opined, would also mean fewer dollars “to prop up the dictator and his cronies” and to feed “the illicit sex trade, a modern form of slavery which is encouraged by the Cuban government.”

Sounds like Batista has returned to re-establish the brothels and casinos

Business As Usual for County Commission

Hopefully, we can all agree that major transportation fixes have to happen or else this area grows malignantly into “Atlanta, the Sequel.”

So, how’s this for a transportation-rallying cry? “When lacking perfectly equitable revenue-raising scenarios and minus safe political cover for everybody, do nothing.” As Hillsborough County Commission mantra, it’s unwieldy. As public policy, it’s unconscionable.

Caveat Gator

By all appearances the University of Florida did quite well in landing Bernie Machen as its new president. The former president of the University of Utah is known to be as candid as he is compassionate. The one time pediatric dentist is personable and puts a premium on good teaching. He likes short meetings and long rides on Harley-Davidsons.

Two other things.

Machen is a crusader for diversity who just recently found out about this state’s anti-affirmative action “One Florida” policy. And last year he fired Utah’s head football coach.

Separating The Truth

It won’t be known for some time exactly how successful that operation in Dallas was that separated the 2-year-old Egyptian twins conjoined at the head. But so far, so good for Ahmed and Mohamed Ibrahim. This much, however, is known. The Egyptian parents and caregivers knew where to go for help. To America.

Mrs. Ibrahim was quoted as “thanking everybody around and thanking her faith that brought her to this great place: Dallas, Texas.”

Wonder if that soundbite ever surfaced on Al-Jazeera?